True Love for Little Introverts


I’d like to begin with a quote from Thornton Wilder to remind us of the realities of childhood and the tenderness of a child’s heart.

“Many who have spent a lifetime in it can tell us less of love than the child that lost a dog yesterday.”

For any child, a pet can be one of the most meaningful and memorable experiences of childhood but for introverted children, it can actually be a lifeline, a saving grace and a haven from what sometimes seems like an alien set of demands in the world around them.! I’m the IntrovertZCoach and I present surveys on my website for introverts because I like to find out straight from the introverts themselves what makes them tick, what makes them sick and what makes them kick!

You might be surprised how many mention the plus-value of a pet, whether in their past or present. Whereas most adult introverts limit their time with two footed creatures, they are willing to spend every waking moment with a four footed companion. There are some good reasons for this. Introverts are drained by people, though this does not mean they dislike people. In many cases, far from it. Many introverts wish they could spend more time socially, but notice that they feel too exhausted afterwards.

A pet can be an ideal companion for an introvert of any age for three basic reasons. 1. Pets are quiet and communicate telepathically. 2. They like to do the things introverts like. 3. And pets don’t interrupt or usurp space. These are big pluses for introverts. Let me explain more carefully.

If there’s one thing grown introverts can’t stand, it’s small talk. Young introverts don’t know how to describe what it is they don’t like, but whatever it is, a pet relieves them of the necessity of talking when there’s nothing to say and filling the space with chatter. Pets don’t ask them stupid questions like, “What did you do today?” or “How’s that new bike of yours doing?” This is a stress reducer.

In addition, pets really truly enjoy some of the things that introverts like the most, too, such as walks in the park, playing outside, dozing in the sun, reading by the fire or curling up in bed to read a good book.

And last but not least, when we say that pets don’t interrupt or usurp space, this is what we mean. Introverts of all ages like to focus and concentrate. This is one of the reasons they like to have a room, closet or box (!) of their own. Rather than busting the door open, grabbing stuff off our desk, hauling your clothes off to the laundry or breaking your crayons by mistake, a pet melts into the background and allows little introverts to continue their absorption in important things like books, toys and internet. On the plus side, pets provide the quiet and steady companionship of another warm-blooded and sentient mammal. San Francisco psychiatrists Thomas Lewis, Fari Amini, and Richard Lannon have spoken about the need for hugs and companionships in their important book, “A General Theory of Love”.

In addition, pets don’t invade personal space. This is significant because a major stressor for introverts is invasion of personal space. The concept of territoriality is difficult to define but characteristic of almost every introvert. Introverts of any age don’t like their hair messed with, their shoulder patted or worse, grabbed, their cloths straightened (while on them!), their books messed with or their toys moved around. Later on this will include their desk, bedroom, closet and the various collections and possessions they include in their personal world. A pet will be much more respectful of your introverted child’s personal world than, say, a little brother or sister or even a best friend. That’s why they can be so comforting and stress reducing.

In summary, little and big introverts dislike small talk, need privacy and uninterrupted time to themselves to restore their batteries and exhibit a strong territoriality. Please know that there is nothing wrong with your introverted child for being this way. It’s not that he or she is anti-social. Introverts give energy when they are in social situations. Extroverts receive energy. It’s as simple as that. After a day at school, your introverted child can be just exhausted. A pet is a great low-stress companion.

As far as caring for a pet, most introverts are able to focus and carry through consistently because they aren’t distracted with the outer world the way extroverts are. In other words, they won’t wander into the tv room for an hour on the way to changing the cat’s water dish. Little introverts have good concentration and this makes it easier for them to remember basic tasks such as feeding, changing the water and cleaning out the cat box. Introverts like to do one thing at a time and they usually enjoy routine tasks that are well defined and unique.

Introversion is a legitimate personality type. Introverts like Steven Spielberg, Albert Einstein, Warren Buffett and Michael Jordan have made and are making significant contributions to the world we live in. There’s nothing wrong with your introverted child. In fact, there’s something right about him or her! Introversion is a legitimate personality type.

Jessamyn West, author of “The Friendly Persuasion” puts it this way, “In their sympathies, children feel nearer animals than adults. They frolic with animals, caress them, share with them feelings neither has words for. Have they ever stroked any adult with the love they bestow on a cat? Hugged any grownup with the ecstasy they feel when clasping a puppy? –

If your child is an introvert, double that answer, “No!” Do your little introverted kid a favor they’ll never forget. Let them pick out a pet of their very own. Would it sound too corny to say they will be eternally grateful?


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Article: ©Nancy R. Fenn, The IntrovertZCoach. Nancy's site is full of tips and good cheer for the introvert. It is possible to be yourself and win! Let Nancy's coaching guide you to success ... Visit her website at The IntrovertZCoach .
This article provided by the Family Content Archives at: http://www.Family-Content.com.

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